Please use word wrapping, found under the Format tab. It flows much nicer then ;)

You are Zampy. You woke up on the 5th of March 4096 at 5:12:43 in the morning. Your flipper was stuck in a electrical socket but oddly you were not hurt, instead you felt like you were getting stronger! The electricity supercharging your muscles and brain. Little did you know or remembered that you tried to commit suicide the night before, you stuck your flipper in the socket and accepted death, this you forgot. You accepted that everyone hated you, that everyone you loved despised you, that no one in the world valued your life. The only people who love you are your parents and they were kidnapped. This you remember, this you know. You are now the most powerful, determined, and unloved walrii in the walriiverse you are only loved by your parents you love your parents and you will get them back.

Zampy’s Quest is also not complete by any means as of now so sorry for that :P.

Controls (Calculator):
 - Left arrow, moves you left
 - Right arrow, moves you right
 - Apps button, Jump away

Controls (PC):
 - Left arrow, moves you left
 - Right arrow, moves you right
 - Up arrow, Jump away

Feature log:

Before 1-19-16:
 - Added level rendering
 - Added 5 maps (only currently accessible via changing of code :/)
 - Added Zampy and iron Zampy (Iron Zampy not implemented yet)
 - Added smooth scrolling
 - Added Super High Tech gravity settings (they are really realistic tho :P)
 - Added super high tech collision
 - Added sweet jumping
 - Added ~146 bugs, in 0 minutes
 - Removed 103 bugs, in more time than I care to admit
 - Ignored 5 bugs, in 0 minutes, after I tried to fix them for quite a while xD 
 - Flattened 38 bugs, with a steamroller
 - Added optimisations
 - Removed code for optimizations
 - Added frame skipping (I don't know exactly but I think it runs at 20-30fps!!!)
 - Added an unnecessary line of code for bugtesting and never removed it xD
 - Added a visual glitch on Zampy
 - Added animation to Zampy
 - Added a main start menu (only the first and last option work though, the second option is credits so apparently I was so lacking on time and I forgot to give credit to myself xD)
 - Added a lot of easter eggs (sadly I couldn’t add them to any levels)
 - Didn’t add enemies (yeah, hell if I know I could even get them to display on the screen :P)
 - Drank coffee 
 - Added this README
 - Fixed visual glitch for Zampy